If you’re in the eye of the storm you never really know you’re there until it passes over. That’s the way it is with most things that bring stress into our lives. Around 7 o'clock when the isolation is at its absolute peak of eating away at me, is when I start to become the most philosophical. There is a monotony that begins to set in during times like these; wake up, do homework, eat, maybe take a shower, wallow in self-pity and then restart the cycle the following day. This isn’t the way I pictured finishing the second semester of my first year in college, but it is reality now. Being on campus was at first considered to be a drag. Most students missed their families and would take the first chance they got to travel home. Most students thought they’d see the friends they made again sometime this school year. Most students didn’t completely understand the value of face to face instruction and missed out on a few lectures not realizing that online classes would be a difficult and slippery task to grapple with for a few reasons. I was one of those students, and even if you fall into a different category, students across the nation will have phrases like; “Practice safe social distancing.”, “Flatten the curve.”, and “Make sure to self-quarantine!” lodged into the deepest inner working’s of their nightmares for years to come. When certain decisions are made for the “greater good”, specific consequences and sacrifices will surely follow.
I can hear the constant ticking of a clock become ever more distant as I begin to question what got me to this point. The direct answer is obvious, but that is only surface level. Wrapped up in a blanket on the couch of a living room only illuminated by a lamp, the memories of the prior weeks start to flood back into my head. It was two days before spring break was ready to kick into gear. Professors were handing out their last assignments, some students were even already gone ready to enjoy a stress-free week. While the pressure of schooling was beginning to lift off my shoulders, there was a completely new alien starting to fall onto everyone in the school. The optimistic upbeat tempo the entire school had, had soon developed into a sense of uncertainty. It was not something most people wanted to feel heading into spring break. In every one of my class periods on that Friday, there were frantic questions being asked due to an email sent out by the school. “Should we take everything?”, “How long will this last?”, “Will we come back?”, “Is this virus really that serious?”, there were floods of questions not even the professors could answer. I sat at breakfast with a table that was filled completely past its capacity with a group of people I had grown to call friends. At first it was the same as usual; we were talking and enjoying each other’s presence. As more time passed, the weight of understanding that this may be the last time we see each other for a long time began to sink in. The mood again shifted from joyous to melancholy. As the group slowly dissipated and said our final goodbyes, it felt as though someone had just died. Saying farewell to that lifestyle was hard enough, leaving behind friends, and losing great resources for the benefit of my education but now I had to adjust to a new lifestyle. It was nothing new, I had been doing it all my life.
Being back in a familiar area for spring break was nice. Connecting with friends, being lazy and doing absolutely nothing because basketball season had just ended, but also checking my email every day to see what news was being relayed. After a few days of nothing the email finally came in that said we were going completely online. A part of me was surprised, while another part of me was angry. At first, I believed it was selfish, and that the school wasn’t considering people like me who didn’t have a stable place to go. I believed that every school across America was acting according to what other campuses did. There were so many problems that arose for me personally once our campus was shut down completely. First there was the portion of finding somewhere to live. Having to explain to basically strangers my situation and why I had no place to go. There was also the problem of retrieving my things back from school. How was I going to rip someone from their daily routine, just so they can help me lug all my belongings somewhere? The final problem for me was getting access to a computer, and all the necessary materials to be successful in my online endeavors. Getting everything figured out took weeks. There was a constant cycle of search and failure. Thankfully in times like these people have a way of coming together, and not letting things like what we as a nation are facing today block the bigger picture. I was able to find a comfortable home through the generosity of some kind people. This house indeed provided me with a place to store my belongings and gave me all the necessary materials to keep up in my studies.
As I had mentioned before when you’re in the eye of the storm you never really notice until it passes over. That statement is true for not only me but for every student in college no matter the background. I was in the center of the entire thing not really understanding what the future of my school year held. This pandemic hit and changed my entire world in an instant. I was deep into the storm and in some ways I still am. Everyone has a different storm to sit through and some peoples rain lasts longer than others. It really all depends on if you’re willing to let the noise happening around you stop you from achieving the goals you set for yourself. In an age where we are empowered as a generation through technology and different means, I believe we will bounce back stronger than ever, let me know if you agree.
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